It was a painful moment while I let her to keep talk. I try to understand everything that came out from her mouth was truly happened and caused a trouble. I keep telling myself to be patience so; I wouldn’t say anything bad or give any miseries comment. While I walking home, I keep thinking everything that she told me. How can people endure too much staying in that kind of situation? It makes me feel bad about what they really mean by love.
She was a great woman with a great career position. Have a strong personality, amiable and good communications skill makes her look happier than anyone else. Of course, she have a good family too because people will never get happy if their family’s relationship break down. Sometimes, I envy her much. That was my thinking of her before. But then, I realize people still have ability to hiding something and keep live happy outside while suffer enough inside.
She got married with her lover. A man she had dating for a long time. Even how much temper he had, she knew. But she continues to love him and marry him. I think that she believe that he will change and everything will be fine. But, life isn’t easy. He keep throw a tantrums to her, getting angry every time and trained their two little girls like a special force squad. It seem like the older girl have stressed a lot and couldn’t talk till now. While the youngest which still a baby started to follow the situation her sister does.
Whatever an advice goes to her, she never ever thinks of divorce. Even how much time he yelled at her, hurt her feeling so much. He always gets angry easily. All the money must be into account and the wife pay almost everything. Sadly, he even controls her money and let her at very minimum expense every month while he did triple than her. Using her money of course! She got Master and he just got Diploma. So who has larger salary? We can tell it by ourselves. What she always hopes was he’ll change!
I’m getting mad! Each time I met this kind of women, who came after a love that for me have been betrayed, suffer enough to stand still, pretending as happier than anyone else, I almost call them stupid. Why? Why must they wait? Hopes? Loves? I quite hate this kind of love.
But, something has crossed my mind then. I met some old lady at a bus station. She earlier, asked me to help her buy something to drink. Then we talk. She was talked about how much obedient wife can be. An honorable woman, who serves their husband very good, try to persuade the husband to be good, have faith to god, even they sometimes seem to be stupid, but still they have a praise for that. A very good one that suffers for having such husband, but with a light heart, she accepted the written destiny and work hard on it. Hope for changes, to be more delightful time in future. They suffer, but they don’t give up trying and trying, so they wait.
That conversation shut my mouth up. I do a rethinking. Feeling like something I lost before. Then I agree, but with conditions. They do have to be praise, for patience, for brave, tough time they had, and they still don’t give up, but there should be a reasonable period to stand, and a bottom line of accepting hurt and suffer. Then, when he breaks the line, and finishes the period, so no more waiting and hope. Just go away and save yourself and your children.
The first line a counselor needs to do in every session is to let them be together. Forgiving, loves. Divorce should be the last solution. A solution when they have no more chance to be good. When together just make explode, hurt and criminal. Of Course, Muslim was taught to be harmony. And Divorce is the most hate thing to be happened. So, I’ll do it too. The best solution ever I can give, while inside I hurt my own heart, and say;
“Do you know that you are good wife at all? A big praise should be yours. Let us hope and wait for some more time. Bring him together to counseling session (even I knew that he would never come!), and try to discuss. Insya-ALLAH everything will turn great. And don’t forget to keep pray. That the most powerful things you have”.
I have decided. I’ll give him another chance. A period of time and a bottom line of hurt and suffer. If he breaks it so I won’t let it go.
“But, don’t forget to tell me the progress; I want to know if there are needs for other solution”. I smiled to her and she smiled back. While watching her walk away from my office, I put stamp on my mind. When she come back again crying, that will the day I files summon.
“Beside the Sun: How tears fall in the sunny day “
p/s : Hidup sentiasa perlu diteruskan dengan pertimbangan dan pilihan. [ Istikharah everytime, everywhere. Hanya petunjuk-Nya mampu menerangi jalan. InsyaALLAH]
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“Aku berdoa agar aku tidak diuji sebegitu. Tidak diuji dengan cinta yang dikhianati sepenuhnya. Kehilangan mungkin lebih mampu untukku terima berbanding pengkhianatan sebegini”
-Anonymous-
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